There are many things in life that I find frustrating. I dislike mess, and things that aren't straight (pictures, table mats, etc etc). There is a natural order to things that, it seems to me, revolves, as it were, around the right angle. Similarly, things should be symmetrical, and centralised. This is why I choose to type using the justified paragraph alignment option selected, even though it does occasionally produce lines where the words are spaced a long way apart. It seems only natural to me that, for example when placing a settee against a wall, the gap on the left should be exactly the same size as the gap on the right. Otherwise, it's not, well, right. To quote Edward Monkton, "Those who do not believe in the Law of Straightness WILL NOT BE SAVED!" OK, I accept that it's unlikely to ever form the basis of my theological understanding, but the sentiment is one I approve of.
I think I would have made a good Roman. Never mind going around the hill, not when you have 100,000 men with stong muscles and nothing to do - go straight through it! Bring it on! Straight is good. If the quickest point is between two straight lines, then it follows that not only is building roads the Roman way good from the "time is money" point of view, but it also makes sense ecologically. The more direct the route, the shorter the resulting road, and consequently the less of our green and pleasant land becomes covered with tarmac, buses and Little Chefs. Which can only be a good thing.
Being ecologically considerate and caring about the environment is important to me. Don't get me wrong, I understand that sometimes things have to happen, and you can't necessarily rationally prevent ALL disruption to the countryside, but in general, I like it green and leafy. I buy free-range and am starting to think about organic (although to be honest, if the cow has a cold I might rather it was treated with antibiotics rather than honey and lemon and a Vicks VapourRub). But again, as a principle, environmentally friendly is good.
Which brings me to the most amazing invention I've read about today.* I'm not much of a gardener at the moment (it comes of living in a flat) but I like plants. And, also liking things straight and organised, I suspect that what I'm really going to want when I'm the proud owner of my very own piece of England, is something to ensure that nothing is going to decrease the symmetry of my planting scheme. Creepy-crawlies are, I understand, not respectors of modern design, which is why I shall be investing in a SlugBot. This wonderful machine uses a combination of GPS, InfraRed and UltraSound to locate slugs, a long arm to grab them, and a bio-fuel cell to convert slug into useful electricity, which in turn powers its on-board battery. It's green, sustainable, and will help me not to lose my precious plants to the slimy rascals. What can be better?
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* OK, it's not got a huge amount of competition, but it sounds more impressive than saying "the only invention I've read about today."
I think I would have made a good Roman. Never mind going around the hill, not when you have 100,000 men with stong muscles and nothing to do - go straight through it! Bring it on! Straight is good. If the quickest point is between two straight lines, then it follows that not only is building roads the Roman way good from the "time is money" point of view, but it also makes sense ecologically. The more direct the route, the shorter the resulting road, and consequently the less of our green and pleasant land becomes covered with tarmac, buses and Little Chefs. Which can only be a good thing.
Being ecologically considerate and caring about the environment is important to me. Don't get me wrong, I understand that sometimes things have to happen, and you can't necessarily rationally prevent ALL disruption to the countryside, but in general, I like it green and leafy. I buy free-range and am starting to think about organic (although to be honest, if the cow has a cold I might rather it was treated with antibiotics rather than honey and lemon and a Vicks VapourRub). But again, as a principle, environmentally friendly is good.
Which brings me to the most amazing invention I've read about today.* I'm not much of a gardener at the moment (it comes of living in a flat) but I like plants. And, also liking things straight and organised, I suspect that what I'm really going to want when I'm the proud owner of my very own piece of England, is something to ensure that nothing is going to decrease the symmetry of my planting scheme. Creepy-crawlies are, I understand, not respectors of modern design, which is why I shall be investing in a SlugBot. This wonderful machine uses a combination of GPS, InfraRed and UltraSound to locate slugs, a long arm to grab them, and a bio-fuel cell to convert slug into useful electricity, which in turn powers its on-board battery. It's green, sustainable, and will help me not to lose my precious plants to the slimy rascals. What can be better?
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* OK, it's not got a huge amount of competition, but it sounds more impressive than saying "the only invention I've read about today."
